Zach Morris Rules...Or So I Thought

I have never considered myself very technically savvy so the idea of getting a cell phone like everyone else where you can download music, play motion sensitive video games, touch screen, email and internet access scared me a little. I barely knew what texting was a year ago and the T9 function took a couple of months to get used to. I was fine with my Zach Morris sized phone, or ZM for short. You know, the episode where Zach called Slater when he was up to no good and told Slater to meet him at The Max...oh wait...that was every episode. All the same, it was large which made it easy to find, it had rubber bumpers on the side so when I threw my phone in a fit of rage it would just bounce off the wall and most importantly it was easy.

My poor Zach Morris phone almost drowned this summer in the pool but luckily I saved it and after it dried out, it miraculously worked again. Ever since the almost drowning, the battery has barely held a charge. On top of that, my cell phone charger decided to act up. I would have to jam the plug in and tilt the phone just right to get a charge. I hated to admit it…but it was time for a new phone.

Since my company gets a 20% discount at AT&T I decided to start there. I looked at all the phones, all better than my ZM. Slidey ones, flip up ones, big fat ones, red ones, blue ones. I didn’t know what to do! I am already such an indecisive person that this is not a good situation to be in, especially when I have no knowledge about this kind of stuff. Then, peering around the corner, I saw it. It was like a ray of sunshine had broken through the clouds and it was shining on a phone…THE phone. I even think doves flew out behind it with Enya’s “Only Time” playing in the background. What was it you ask? The almighty iphone.

The thought of ever getting a cell phone of such proportions never crossed my mind in the least. What would I do with it? Who would teach me to use it? And the most important question the frugal girl asks is, do I really need this? The answer was yes. Yes I did need it. It was all shiny and cute. You just touch it and it goes to the internet, the real internet! Not some contorted form of the internet. I could play Elton John at a moments notice. I could play Mario Bros (1, 2 and 3) when my heart desired. At this time my friends, there was no turning back.

My little greedy fingers didn’t hesitate at the least to find my credit card. I could not wait any longer – I MUST HAVE iPHONE!!!! Then it happened. The evil man at the other side of the counter told me the worst news; I had to wait 2-3 weeks for my phone. What? Wait? Fine. It was totally worth it. I was going to take over the world with my awesome new phone. Muwahahahahaha!

The waiting was horrible. I felt like a possessive girlfriend. I would check the tracking number every hour to see if had been shipped. Then once shipped I would see where it was and what it was doing there. Then finally it happened. They called and my baby had arrived. Yippee!!

I took it out of the box and started playing with it immediately but I forgot one little thing, I know about as much about computer stuff as I know about being normal. Good thing I had people to help me. I love my new phone. It sings to me, it tells me the scores to the game and what time the movie is playing. It tells me where the nearest Starbucks and Mexican restaurant is. We play racing and guitar hero games together. We my friend, are in love. super duper love.

You may be wondering “Krista, what did you do with old ZM?” It took awhile to get over and a tear to say goodbye. Who am I kidding? No it didn’t. That phone sucked and this one is the coolest of all time!!! It is like when girl is so in love with a guy and never think she will fall in love again then the clouds part and Mr. Perfect arrives. Once Mr. Perfect is there you start forgetting why you loved the old dude so much. Why did I love ZM so much? Although it had its purpose, it was time to move on and I did just that. I finally knew what everyone was talking about. Although ZM will be missed, I hope you will all embrace iphone. I think you will like it as much as I do!!